Reader Shubham Verma explains what men do after a breakup in this DU Speak feature.
“You are a moron and you just don’t get me!”
“You are going to be miserable and stay alone all your life!”
Dear girls out there, do these words ring a bell? I think you CAN relate to these words pretty well as you end up using them more frequently than we guys do.
We all know that relationships fail, breakups happen and more often than not, guys end up getting “dumped”. When there is a break-up fight happening, just watch for a minute. You will see the girl talking. A lot. She will tell the guy about how they don’t ‘connect’ and how she “needs time to figure things out”. The best one I have heard is that ‘We need to take a break to find ourselves’. What does that even mean? Anyway, look at the guy. He will just stand there. Dumbfound. He was expecting to have a nice evening with his girl. Instead, he gets dumped.
Men are supposed to be strong. Men are supposed to be all about muscle and guts and be brave. We must be ready for anything and everything. I mean…”Be a Man” right? Honestly, I feel it is total crap. Nobody can be ‘ready’ to get dumped and break up. Especially if it is a serious relationship.
So what do girls think we do after we break up? Contrary to popular belief, we don’t bitch about you. We don’t get right back to dating someone again right away. We don’t go to strip clubs. We do what girls do. Only a few things are different.
We cry. We cry ourselves to sleep. YES! I am not lying. Men cry. ALL men cry… only a few accept it. I know I cry. Hell, I cry every time I see Titanic or a Karan Johar family flick. So you can imagine what I would do when a serious relationship breaks up.
Like girls, boys cry. Like girls, we too like that big tub of chocolate fudge ice cream. We too end up doing nothing and just moping around in our pyjamas. The only possible different thing that we do is that we end up drinking scotch more than water and have a packet of chips for meals. We too watch movies. We just watch Arnold Schwarzenegger kill people and we don’t leave the gaming console. We can’t get enough of the feeling of killing terrorists or scoring a goal from 35 yards. We feel relieved. It is our way of dealing with heartbreak – alcohol and violent video games.
We eventually talk, but not with that ‘Agony Aunt’ type of friend. We talk to God. Yeah… you heard me right. We talk to God. For guys, God is THE guy. This will be the guy who has the looks, the attitude, the ride, the perfect girl; but above all, he has been down and out, but has bounced back. We will go on talking about how “she is the best thing that ever happened to me” and how “I can’t live without her”. He will listen. He won’t judge us. After we end up crying again and finally say “you tell me what to do? “. He will just say a few words…just enough to make us see sense. He will tell us ‘If she loves you the way you love her, she’ll be back soon… if not, GROW A PAIR and find love again’. Didn’t I tell you we talk to God?
What I am trying to say here is that when we suffer rejection in love, we cry too – we mope around and we are a mess. Most importantly though, we too are hurting and like you, we too get affected. So the next time you say that “breakups won’t affect you. You will just get together with someone else…” please think again. After all, we aren’t the “spiteful pigs” you might consider us to be.
DU Speak article by Shubham Verma